


John Travolta Ain't Got Nothing on Me

by Kasuchi



Category: Gossip Girl
Genre: Childhood, Gen, Theatre
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-06-27
Updated: 2009-06-27
Packaged: 2017-11-18 00:32:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,615
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/554922
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kasuchi/pseuds/Kasuchi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I got chills! They're multiplying, and I'm losing control. 'Cause the power you're supplying -- it's electrifying! (The fifth grade class decides to put on a class play in the spring. Chuck and Blair are cast as the leads. Hi-jinks ensue.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	John Travolta Ain't Got Nothing on Me

**Author's Note:**

> Much love to [](http://wintergreen126.livejournal.com/profile)[](http://wintergreen126.livejournal.com/)**wintergreen126** for her quickie beta! 
> 
> This is an "all the best parts" fic, meaning transitions are sudden. It's sort of like writing a long string of interconnected drabbles. But each section is like 2.5 drabbles.

**1\. alma mater**

Even at eleven Chuck knew that he wanted to be in control.

"No."

"Charles Alexander Bass, don't use that tone with me." Bart Bass stared dispassionately down at his son. In his hand was a sheaf of papers, all headed with the same Birch Walthem Lennox Academy logo. "Now, you're going to participate."

"But, Father--"

"No buts. You're not getting out of this one."

Chuck pouted. "Fine."

Nanny Marianne gazed at Bart Bass with something like reverence. "Thank you so much, Mr. Bass. I wasn't sure what to do."

Bart didn't look up from the papers. "Well, the next time he locks himself in the pool house just ask Javier to change the lock."

"Yes, of course." She put a hand around Chuck's shoulders. "Thank you again, Mr. Bass. Will we see you at dinner?"

"Unfortunately no. I'm meeting a client for dinner in Toronto."

"Oh." Marianne bit her bottom lip. Chuck looked resolutely at his shoes. "Well, have a nice trip."

"Thank you." He handed her the papers and turned back to his desk, as good a dismissal as any. Marianne ushered Chuck out of the study.

"Seriously, Marie, that was low."

"What?"

"Going to my father? Really?"

"Yeah, well, I told you that he'd make you do it. We could have avoided this whole thing."

"Whatever. What're we doing for dinner?"

"You pick."

"Avokashi?"

"Sure."

"Yes!"

"But we're reading the script out loud together."

"No way."

"Then no deal."

Chuck rolled his eyes. "Marianne, there's like 30 parts and only two of us--"

"Ha!" Marianne thumped his shoulder. "You're read it already!"

Chuck scowled.

Marianne raised an eyebrow, arms akimbo.

Chuck broke first. "Fine. I may have read the first few pages."

Marianne ruffled his hair (Chuck immediately tried to fix it) and grinned. "Oh, this is going to be _so precious_!"

**2\. summer nights**

Blair surveyed her closet.

As her nanny looked on, she rifled through her hangers. Twice. Then, pushing her way out of the closet, she stamped her foot and glared. "None of these will work!" she cried, crossing her arms across her chest.

"Blair, it's okay. We'll get a tailor and rework one of your dresses so that it looks right."

The eleven-year-old's frown lessened, though her brow remained furrowed. "Fine."

The nanny bit back a sigh of relief. "All right, how about we run lines. You stay Sandra Dee, and I'll be everyone else."

Blair's face suddenly brightened. "Can we call Serena?"

"Who's she again?"

"Frenchie!"

"Right, right. Okay, let's give her a call."

Blair grabbed her phone and hit the speed dial.

**3\. hopelessly devoted to you**

Chuck's mouth dropped open. Behind him, so did Nate's.

"Wait, so we have to take dance lessons?"

The director (the music teacher, but no one was asking) nodded solemnly. "This is a musical! You all have to sing and dance. We've gotten the singing and the acting auditions done. Now all that's left is making sure you can all do the steps."

Collectively, the boys groaned. Well, except for John-Taylor, who clapped his hands excitedly and beamed, but he took ballet, so everyone ignored him.

"Miss Waldorf, Mister Bass, we'll start with the ending number. Now, have either of you seen the film already?"

Blair nodded. Chuck's face remained still and impassive.

"Ah, maybe we'll start with Summer Lovin', instead."

**4\. you're the one that i want**

"Charles Bass, you come back here!"

"No." Chuck crossed his arms and pouted, but continued to stride away, pausing to pivot at the door. "This is the stupidest thing I've ever heard."

Blair stamped her foot and balled her hands into fists. "Stupid, maybe, but you're supposed to run lines with me. We have to memorize them for the show." Her eyes narrowed into a glare. "If you ruin this for me, so help me..."

Chuck rolled his eyes. "Whatever. I'm out of here."

"Oh really?" Eleanor Waldorf blocked his path out. Blair suddenly straightened, and Chuck's eyes widened. "Hello, Charles. I just had a very illuminating chat with Miss Marianne. Apparently you're going to play Danny Zuko in the class play?"

Chuck nodded silently, arms falling to his sides. "Yes, Mrs. Waldorf."

"Wonderful. I'd love to watch you two rehearse. In fact," she paused, and leaned back. "Marianne, Jessica, could you come in here please?" After a moment, the two nannies appeared, brushing out their clothes. "How about you two help Blair and Charles run through their lines."

The two nannies met eyes and shrugged. "Sure, that sounds fun." Marianne smiled politely and rested a hand against Chuck's back, turning him around and marching him back into the room with Blair. "What scene are you guys working on?"

Chuck frowned and opened his script. "Diner date," he mumbled, and pushed the pages to her. Across from them, Blair and Jess flipped forward a couple of pages. Eleanor quietly fell into a chair, crossed her legs primly, and watched.

**5\. sandy**

Serena laughed. "So have you seen the wig?"

Blair's brow furrowed. " _What_ wig?"

"The wig! Sandy's a blonde." At Blair's mildly horrified expression, Serena rubbed a hand across the other girl's shoulders. "Don't worry, I have to wear a pink wig for a few scenes."

"But....blonde hair will ruin the look of my dress!"

"What?"

"Ugh, this is a disaster!"

**6\. beauty school dropout**

Nate poked Chuck in the cheek. "Dude. Dude. Dude?"

A dozing Chuck sat up, startled. "I'm awake!" he cried, a little too loudly. A few others nearby turned to look, some laughing quietly.

"Chill, we're between periods. You slept through English, no problem."

Chuck appeared relieved, then thoughtful. "You think if I got caught sleeping in class they'd take away the part in the play as punishment?"

"Not if they think you want them to do that."

Chuck appeared smug. "Nathaniel, I am nothing if not a great actor."

"Yeah, well, a lot of good that's done you so far."

Chuck's smug expression fell. "Whatever."

Nate bit his tongue. "So, you ready for the kiss?"

"What kiss?"

Nate raised an eyebrow. "What kiss?" he echoed, astonished. "Chuck! Danny makes out with like two girls like four times. What do you mean, what kiss?!"

"I haven't read that far in the script," Chuck admitted, buffing his nails on his nautical-themed pashmina afghan.

Nate's eye twitches. "Yes, well, you kiss a couple of girls. Onstage. For more than half a second."

Chuck looked away from his perfectly shining nails, meeting Nate's mildly impatient gaze. He grinned rakishly. "Awesome."

**7\. look at me, i'm sandra dee**

"Oh, Blair, that dress is beautiful."

Blair smirked. "I know. And the crinoline makes it puff out so nicely."

Jessica nodded. "And the color will look great with the blonde wig. And the Keds we got are the perfect finisher."

"Keds." She wrinkled her nose. "Why couldn't I at least have gotten Converse All-Stars?"

"Because girls didn't wear those then," Jessica replied patiently, gently placing the dress on a satin hanger.

"Whatever. At least the poodle skirts are adorable."

"If there's a sock hop, you'll be prepared," Jessica laughed.

Blair's brow furrowed. "Sock hop?"

"Uh. It's a retro kind of dance."

Jessica watched as Blair pondered this for a moment, then scrunched her nose. "Old people are weird," she declared, and shook out her new clothes, laying them carefully on the bed.

**8\. greased lightning**

"Okay, today I just need the boys. We're going to practice the boys' number."

The girls cheered and grabbed their bags, filing out of the auditorium chattering and laughing. The boys appeared considerably more put out. Well, except for John-Taylor, who looked perhaps too excited.

"All right, first we'll run through the male half of Summer Lovin'. You've all been practicing the choreography, right?"

John-Taylor was the only one who nodded.

The director's smile didn't even twitch. "Well, let's just see where you're at. A five, six, seven, eight!" She turned the music on, and Chuck and the other boys took their positions on the bleachers onstage.

As they moved through the steps of the song-and-dance number, the boys eased up and started to enjoy themselves a little bit more. Some of the more awkward - like that weird Aaron kid - loosened up and got into character.

Chuck's own motions smoothed out, though his smirk looked the same as it ever did.

**9\. it's raining on prom night**

"Chuck!"

"What is it, Blair?"

She fidgeted, shifted her weight from foot to foot. "Is your dad gonna be at the show?"

His mouth thinned into a line. "No. Marie's going to be with me."

"Oh." She studies the material of her dress, the pattern of the carpet for a second. "My mom wanted to know."

"Tell her the only member of the Bass family in that auditorium that night will be me." He stood abruptly. "I have to go. Excuse me." He pushed past her.

Blair watched him stride away, then sighed.

**10\. blue moon**

"Are you nervous for the kissing?"

Blair glanced up at Chuck from her script. "Not really?" They were running lines, but were taking a snack break. "Why?" She narrowed her eyes. "Should I be?"

"No!" Chuck raised an eyebrow. "Nate just wondered if you were nervous about it."

Her face lit up. "Nate was worried about me? Oh that's so sweet of him."

Chuck shook his head. "Yes, and he's such a wonderful guy. Blah, blah, blah. I'll make sure to let him know you aren't nervous or worried or anything."

"Well." She paused and worried her lip a little. "I mean, I'm a little nervous." She clasped her hands in her lap. "It'll be my first kiss," she muttered.

"What? No, it won't." Chuck looked at her like she was crazy.

"I don't follow."

"Blair, we're _acting_. Kisses onstage aren't really kisses."

"Oh." She sighed and leaned back, muscles relaxing. "That's good."

The edges of Chuck's mouth turned up. "You really thought...?"

She glared.

He sputtered and then started to laugh, the full kind of laugh in which he so rarely indulged. His hands crossed over his stomach, and his eyes narrowed in mirth. "You...really...thought....kiss!" He managed between bouts of laughter.

"Chuck! Shut up!" But her own mouth was twitching and she burst into giggles, more at the ridiculous image of him laughing than at her seeming naivete.

When Chuck finally managed to breathe normally again, Blair raised an eyebrow (but her expression remained amused) and asked, "Are you ready to keep going?"

"Yeah, sure. Where do you want to start?"

**11\. rock 'n' roll is here to stay**

"Partner dancing?" Nate looked seriously unamused, as did the veritable army of boys behind him.

Their director nodded enthusiastically. "Today, you're all learning the steps for the prom scenes. You'll learn 50s style dancing and then the hand jive sequence." She sniffed. "You'll all have to practice, so I suggest that you make nice with your partner." She waved her hands. "Partner up!"

Grumbling, the students mingled until they ran into their designated partner. Nate and Georgina stood a little too far apart for people expected to dance, Weird Aaron stood too close, and Serena laughed with her dark-haired, slightly shorter partner.

Blair and Chuck looked at each other. "Don't step on my toes this time," Blair muttered, raising her hands into dancing position.

"Then don't trip and pull me down this time," he retorted, fitting his hands with hers.

The music started up.

**12\. those magic changes**

"Chuck! Sit still, I need to practice applying your stage makeup." Marianne clicked her tongue and swiped the cotton across his eyes and cheeks for the fourth time.

"I don't see why we can't just hire a makeup artist for the night," he groused, wincing as she pressed too hard into his skin. "Watch it!"

"Sorry! But if you just would stay still this wouldn't be a problem."

"I _am_ sitting still. Your hands are shaking!"

Marianna shot him a flat look. "Keep that up, and I'll make you look like an Oompa-Loompa."

Chuck gasped. "You wouldn't!"

Marianne arched an eyebrow. "Try me."

Chuck pouted, something he only seemed inclined to do around her. "Fine. I'll be still as a stone."

"Good." Her expression softened. "When we're done, I'll play videogames with you, if you want."

Chuck blinked. "Deal."

**13\. hound dog**

Blair and Serena walked into the common area of the school and saw Chuck - and there was no other word for it - _flirting_ with Georgina Sparks.

Serena gasped softly. Blair just rolled her eyes. "Georgie-porgie, pudding and pie," she muttered, and grabbed Serena's arm. "Let's go somewhere else, S."

"Oh-kay," Serena replied haltingly, unable to tear her eyes away from the sight.

**14\. born to hand jive**

" _Why_ are we in the Flatiron District? This is almost too close to Brooklyn for my taste."

Any other child, Marianne thought, would simply be whining. Chuck Bass had to be passive-aggressive. "Look, we need to find you clothes for your costumes."

Chuck shrugged. "We'll just get them specially tailored. I don't know why we're down here. The Garment District is north of 34th." He wrinkled his nose. "We're at...17th."

"You'll look too nice," Marianne replied simply, pulling him inside a large vintage clothing store. "We're going for authenticity, not quality."

"But how is a 50-year-old jacket any less authentic than a newly made bomber? The jacket wouldn't have been that old when they wore it." Chuck _sounded_ reasonable, but Marianne knew he just wanted to get back above 71st.

"Fair, but you'll be onstage in this outfit. Leather jacket, long jeans, boots. You'll have to sing and dance in a suit. Do you really want to ruin your Ermenegildo Zegna shirt or an Andrew Marc jacket?"

Chuck's face appeared terrified for a fleeting instant before his features schooled themselves into their usual bored expression. "Fine."

Marianne grinned. "You're such a girl about clothes." Tugging him inside, she pushed him towards a rack of scarves. "Go over there. I'll call for you if I need you."

**15\. tears on my pillow**

"Apparently I get to sexually harass you in this scene." Chuck smirked at her over his script.

Blair was having none of it. "What else is new?"

Chuck practically _pouted_.

**16\. there are worse things i could do**

"Maybe we should practice kissing."

"Blair, I'm always up for practicing kissing." He leered suggestively at her.

"Ugh, you're so gross. Would you be serious for like five seconds? We have to kiss in like four scenes." When he continued leering, she smacked him in the arm. "C'mon, Bass. Pucker up."

He cast a furtive eye around the room. "Later," he said simply, fidgeting. "I don't feel like having your dad kick me out because he didn't realize we're just practicing for the show."

Blair blinked at him for a moment. "Okay, then let's do the rest of the drive-in sequence."

**17\. look at me, i'm sandra dee (reprise)**

Nate wiped his brow with the back of his hand. It left a large streak of green across his forehead. Chuck opted to not tell him.

Ten feet away, Blair and about half the girls sat in a circle, sewing lace collars onto cropped pintuck shirts. "Why are we doing this instead of someone else?" she grumbled, sucking on her thumb when a needle pricked her for the seventh time.

Serena knotted off the end of her thread and shook out her shirt. "It's to build character." Surveying her work, uneven stitches and collar slightly lopsided, she shrugged and tossed it into the pile of finished shirts. "Be glad you don't have to finish the sets."

John-Taylor shouted an oath and shook out his hand, thumb swelling quickly. "Fair enough," Blair granted. "Still, you'd think they'd have realized the sets and costumes wouldn't be ready for the dress rehearsal sooner than two days before."

"Yeah, well, they cancelled our homework for the week, so I'm not complaining," Nate retorted, smudges of red and blue on his cheeks.

"Nate," Serena called, threading a needle. "You need to stop touching your face - there's paint all over it."

Nate glared at Chuck, who demurely painted a basketball backboard. "Is she right?"

Chuck smiled serenely. "Perhaps you should wash up, Nathaniel."

"You're the worst best friend ever," Nate muttered without much fire, tossing his brush into the pan. "I'm taking five," he announced, and stalked off.

Chuck clicked his tongue. "Such a touchy young man." Most people within earshot laughed softly.

**18\. we go together**

The cast cheered, posed exuberantly around Danny and Sandy as they shared one last kiss, shouting, "We'll always be together!" Everyone froze in place, waiting for the curtain to close so that they could move into place for their curtain call.

When even that had been rehearsed, the director signaled for the curtains to open and for everyone to file onstage. The entire cast and crew filed out, the behind-the-scenes players attired in black while the rest of the cast remained in costume.

In her tight leather pants and spandex shirt, Blair panted and fanned herself. "This is so ridiculously hot," she muttered. "Thank _god_ they didn't make me wear the blonde wig."

Chuck shrugged off his leather jacket. "I didn't think I could sweat this much." He shook out the jacket and grimaced. "Ugh, Marianne was right."

The director clapped twice sharply to get their attention. "Well-done everyone! That was an amazing dress rehearsal. You've all obviously worked very hard." She smiled and took a deep breath. "Get dressed, go home, and go to bed _early_. Tomorrow's the big day. We'll work on some last-minute stuff tomorrow afternoon. For now, take the rest of the night off."

The cast cheered and ran offstage to shimmy out of poodle skirts and tapered jeans and into their uniforms. Blair and Chucked filed off last.

"You ready for tomorrow?"

Chuck cast a sidelong glance at her before turning his attention back to his Chuck Taylors. "I think so." He cleared his throat. "You were good. I'm really glad they didn't make you wear the blonde wig."

She beamed. "Thanks. So were you - I didn't think you could sing as well as you can."

"Please. Bass men are men of many talents."

"I can see that," she retorted, a wry smile pulling at her lips. She bumped her shoulder into his. "My ride's outside. I'll see you tomorrow." She half-jogged over to Jessica and immediately told her about being onstage.

After a few minutes, Marianne showed up. "Well? How do you feel?"

Chuck blinked up at her, his leather jacket slung over a crooked arm. He felt like a maitre'd. "Eh," he shrugged. "Let's go home. I'm tired." He moved around her and headed for the limo.

Marianne cocked her head to the side. "Eh?" she echoed, confusion in her voice.

**19\. grease (reprise)**

Everyone got into position off-stage, lined up and ready to run onto the floor as soon as the curtain rose and the music played.

Chuck shifted his weight nervously from foot to foot. He adjusted his jacket, stuffed his hands into various pockets in succession, and then started to breathe loudly.

Nate kicked him in the shin. "Dude, relax. We've been practicing for like two months. Would you chill?" Nate smirked. "Besides, if you ruin this for Blair, she'll pretty much hate you forever and then who would you plot with?"

Chuck glared at nate. "You are the worst best friend ever."

Nate laughed.

The curtain rose and the school's alma mater began to play. The cast ran out, cheering and greeting each other as had been choreographed, faked conversations about summer vacation mingling together until everything was a cacophany. The Pink Ladies greeted each other, and then the T-birds. One of them asked where Danny was and Chuck took a breath and walked onstage.

"Hey, guys, what's--"

And then he froze. He felt every pair of eyes on him, even if he couldn't see them.

The other T-birds surreptitiously exchanged worried glances. "Hey, Danny," Nate said pointedly. "How you doin'? Did you have a good time on vacation." He slung an arm around Chuck's shoulders and muttered, "Pull yourself together!"

"I--"

"It was great, wasn't it?"

"Yeah, you letters mentioned a girl?"

The others tried to feed him his lines, but Chuck couldn't hear over the sound of his panic attack. Shrugging off Nate's arm, he raced offstage. The audience murmured quietly. Thinking quickly, the other T-Birds raced after him.

"Chuck, what are you _doing_ ," Nate hissed.

"Dude, you're messing everything up," added another guy. The other T-birds nodded emphatically.

"I can't go out there," Chuck insisted.

"Why the hell not?!"

"I...really don't want to."

The T-birds gaped at him.

"You don't want to," Nate repeated, incredulous. "You don't really feel like going onstage."

"That's what that means, yes, Nathaniel."

Nate grabbed Chuck by the shoulders and hauled him to his feet. "You couldn't have decided this _before we all started the show?!_ "

"Nate, I just froze. Don't make me go out there," Chuck muttered quietly, so only Nate could hear

Nate let go of his shoulders and buried his face in his hands. "Jake, find his understudy. Chuck, give me the jacket."

Silently, Chuck shrugged off the T-bird emblazoned jacket and tossed it at Nate. "Sorry," he muttered.

"Not as sorry as you'll be when Blair finds out." Nate sighed. "Go talk to the director or the stage manager, see if there's something you can do behind the scenes."

Nate walked off, the others following him. Chuck watched them for a few moments before sneaking out the tech workshop. In the chaos that was backstage, nobody noticed him leave.

**Author's Note:**

> 1\. Summary is a line from "You're the One that I Want," which is from _Grease_. (Duh.)
> 
> 2\. Birch Walthem Lennox Academy is based on a real Upper East Side elementary school, but that's definitely not the actual name. Uh, okay, so I looked at the prices for this school? I nearly fell over - one year's tuition is more than both my families' cars!
> 
> 3\. I pretty much wrote this on a whim. I saw Grease and thought, there should be a Gossip Girl version of this. Aaaaand when we saw the play (in the show), I wondered when Chuck had figured out that he had debilitating stage fright. (Which I find lolarious, just fyi. Please, as if. He just didn't want to do it. And the writers needed an excuse for him to run off and get ~involved~ in that crazy shadow organization stuff.)


End file.
